Affirmation, Acceptance, Appreciation
Affirming them in everything they do. Accepting them for who they are, no matter what they do, the good, the bad, the ugly and finding ways to appreciate them. Seemed a fair summary of how I like to parent. It hung with me throughout the day and have considered how it can be a measure to which I gauge my parenting. At the end of each day to do a little mental check of how I have affirmed, accepted and appreciated each of my children. Though parenting can never be simplified to formula's or checklists, do find anything that helps improve or encourage my parenting is a good thing. Am sure others would agree, we can use all the help we can find!
Most of us as parents naturally do the triple A affect, without even giving it conscious thought. We affirm, accept and appreciate our children in myriads of ways every single day. Wondering where nature vs nurture comes into play and deliberate, intentional practise of these can have magnified affect? It's around attitude and behaviour and hopefully if modelled to our children, they too will want to affirm, accept and appreciate those around them. Some would query about affirming and accepting when bad behaviour is demonstrated. I guess for me when disappointed by choices made by mine, being able to still affirm my love, acceptance and appreciate them while clearly defining the behaviour as unacceptable is tricky but do-able. The refining parts of parenting, consistent love and limits as explored before.
As one who tries to follow Christ and practise an active Christian faith, find that prayer is one way that channels all my hopes, dreams and desires for my children. No I don't pray they will all become Olympic champions or doctors, it's not about using prayer as a tool of manipulation. Prayer is rather a beautiful invitation to bring our concerns and struggles in parenting, in life, to Someone greater than ourselves. We cannot force our children to do anything and thankfully they are not robots! They make their own choices. Learning early that their choices come with consequences is one of the best lessons we can ever teach them. We can only trust that our careful, loving parenting has grounded them for life and provided them the right balance of guidelines and freedom to make healthy, wise choices that will keep them safe and fulfilled human beings.
As we parent toddlers to teens today, let's find creative, fun ways to affirm, accept and appreciate them. If finding the going tough, try bringing it in prayer to the One who is known from the beginning of time as the Father of all comfort. He has answered many of my tear filled prayers for my children in ways that could I never have imagined, enough to fill a book/blog, some of which I have already shared and many more to come......
Cherishing our children today by affirming, accepting and appreciating them.
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